Breaking Even In The Drug Trade, Part 1

He phrased it like a statement: "Why don't you let me buy you lunch. I think I still owe you from last time." He paused a second in preparation for his next words, a smile in his voice. "I got a business proposition for ya."

I met him at Friendly's out on the strip. Big, wide shoulders, grin on his face like he had some master plan cooking in the back of his head all the time. We'd gone to kindergarten together. I'd been the smartest kid in our little elementary school growing up-- he'd always figured me for some sort of genius ever since.

"I got something for you to wrap that big brain around."

"Okay, what's up?"

He leaned in close and talked in hushed tones, his voice all gravelly and low. You could smell the Marlboros on his breath. "How much weed would you say is on a good outdoor plant?"

I guessed. "About a half a pound? Give or take?"

"So how many marijuana seeds do you think would fit in a coffee can?"

I smiled. "Jeesus, could be ten thousand, for all I know. Thousands, anyway."

"So if you had a coffee can full of seeds, and you planted them all, and say half of them germinated..."

"If you assumed there was 4000 seeds in a can, conservative estimate, so 2000 plants..."

"How much weed is that? That's a lot of weed..."

I tried to count in my head. "That's a fuckton of weed, man."

He laughed. I blinked hard. "That's a thousand fucking pounds of marijuana, dude."

"Well what would you say if I told you I could get you a big coffee can full of seeds for 500 bucks?"

"I'd say you have one hell of a connection."

"And I know a guy who'll pay $1800 a pound for large quantity. He might try to push us down to more like $1200."

"$1500 a pound is one and a half million dollars worth of marijuana."

He nodded. "That's a lot of fucking money."

I pointed my finger at the table for emphasis. "That was a conservative estimate."

His spidery grin grew wider as he leaned in. "Got 500 bucks?"

"Do you have a location in mind?"

"Dude, we are gonna be smoking joints the size of your wrist."

"Where are we gonna plant it?"

"I'll show you. I've got a great place lined up."